My New Year’s ReVolution

New Year’s Resolutions? Who needs ’em? Come on, people. We all know we want to go gung-ho after this past month of excess in eating, spending, and whatever it is we think we shouldn’t be doing. But I have come to a realization, in my life at least, that these goals start out with a bang, just like the fireworks at the strike of midnight and fizzle out almost as quickly. Did you know fewer than one in 10 Britons kept a New Year’s resolution for the whole of 2009?

This year I am going on a revolution! And if there is ONE thing I should do for myself this year is stand up for myself. No more Mrs. Nice Gal. It hasn’t done much for me this past year. If anything, being nice has kept me from achieving my goals, and brought on lots of unnecessary work as well. By being nice, I live without things I want just to make someone else’s life easier. I do more work just to make someone else’s life easier. Let’s see what happens if I shake things up this year.

I have dug up some of the most popular resolutions. Now it is time to put it in another perspective.

1 Lose weight.
If I’m going to get people to take notice of me, losing weight is not the answer. I will need to push my weight around. If anything, I need to gain some muscle!

2 Save money
No, thanks. I’ve been doing that this past year and what have I got from it? Holey socks and still no new kitchen table. I need to spend me some money!

3 Go on a diet
Well, duh. If you aren’t on a diet, you will die! Maybe I will just eat more spinach like Popeye.

4 Give up smoking
Considering I don’t smoke, I can’t do that. In fact, maybe I will start. Or at least go around with a cigarette hanging from my bottom lip going up and down as I demand what it is I want to demand at that moment. It seems to work in those old black and white films.

5 Assess work/life balance
For crikey’s sake, I do that all day every day. They are one and the same. Let’s go for an imbalance of less work, more play.

6 Learn a new skill
Just to be a rebel, I will learn an old skill. Maybe crocheting, or basketweaving, or carpentry.

7 Be kinder to myself.
This one I’ll keep. I may be my only friend, if this whole revolution thing goes bust.

8 Eat less chocolate
What? Eat LESS chocolate? That is one of the best joys in life! Bring on the endorphins!

5 comments on “My New Year’s ReVolution

  1. LOL!! LOVE it!! Yes take care of yourself girl and stand up to the world and the family… us Mom’s get left in the dust if we don’t, and with NOTHIN! LOL OH and I threaten my dh all the time I’m going to take up smoking…. because HE does and because he does whenever HE feels like it he gets to go out to the smoking area, shut the door, block us all out and Take a BREAK……………….. so maybe I will take up smoking so I can block everyone out and take mulitple breaks from the family in SILENCE! Hats off to you girl! Hilarious!

  2. Might I be drafted into your army?

    Thanks for your sweet note the other day.

  3. But I’m not ‘back.’ I’m finished! 🙂

  4. […] we are, a new year, a new beginning. Last year I wrote about a New Year’s Revolution. But as Dr. Phil would say “How’s that workin for ya?” The kind of answer that […]

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